From the Perspective of Stencil

Let me ask you a question. Are you ready for this?!? You better be! I am the man, the myth, the legend! I’m freaking Stencil and I look like your favorite sports team went to Monster Jam in a construction site! Other fonts might try to bore with their loopy scripts or bubble letters. Bubbles?!? What do you do for a living, hug trees?! It’s time for a real man’s font! Ditch Calibri and Ariel, writing with me means you just transported to the Real World! Where’s my lower case? Please, I’m Stencil. I am a stencil! I hang out on boxes and signs! I’m spray painted on buildings and Asphalt! I’m in the workforce! I’m getting things done! Lowercase is for Todd In accounting and his precious expense reports! When was the last time Baskerville got this box of hand grenades shipped to the right spot? Spoiler Alert: Never! When you’re in my line of work, you have to be assertive. You have to be clean. I can’t do lowercase, pansy! Lowercase is for people who like to argue. I don’t argue! I am the Answer! I am direction! I’m the font on that building showing you to your favorite underground club, on that parking space keeping you from getting fired for taking the boss’s spot, and on that crate so you know that its contents, like me, are highly explosive! Listen here, if I’m good enough for the Pittsburgh Steelers, then I’m good enough for you! So join me, Stencil, and make this a world of action!